hello 大家好，我是達達。
對我來說, 「精神強大」意味著: 無論身處何種境地或局面, 都有能力調節自己的情緒、管理自己的思維、並以一種良性的心態和方式行事。而培養強大的精神, 需要找到按自己的價值體系去生活的勇氣、並以一種無畏的姿態樹立屬於自己的成功標準。
演講者Amy Morin是一個暢銷書作家，她寫的書《13 things mentally strong people don't do》受到了熱烈的好評，今天的演講就是關於和這本書息息相關的分析。一起來看看，另外今天在公眾號回覆“13” 可以看到具體的13件事。我在公眾號等你。
演講者：Amy Morin
演說題目：
精神強大的人絕不會做的13件事情
13 things mentally strong people don't do
So, I have a Facebook friend whose life seems perfect. She lives in a gorgeous house. And she has a really rewarding career. And she and her family go on all these exciting adventures together on the weekends.
我的社交網路上有一個朋友，她的生活看起來很完美。她住在一所漂亮的房子裡，她有一個非常有意義的職業。她和她的家人在週末的時候，會一起進行一些令人興奮的冒險。
And I swear that they must take a professional photographer along with them, because no matter where they go or what they do, the whole family just looks beautiful. And she's always posting about how blessed she is, and how grateful she is for the life that she has.
我發誓一定是一直在身邊帶著一個專業攝影師。因為不管她去了哪裡，或做了什麼，整個家庭看起來都很完美，她總是發帖說她是多麼幸福，多麼感激她所擁有的生活。
And I get the feeling that she's not just saying those things for the sake of Facebook, but she truly means it. How many of you have a friend kind of like that？And how many of you kind of don't like that person sometimes?
我覺得她說的這些話，不僅僅是為了Facebook，她真是認真的。你們中有多少人有這樣的朋友？你們中有多少人，時常會覺得那個人很討厭？
We all do this, right? It's hard not to do. But that way of thinking costs us something. And that's what I want to talk to you about today — is what our bad habits cost us. Maybe you've scrolled through your Facebook feed and you think,
我們都會這樣，對吧？很難不感到嫉妒，但這種思維方式會讓我們付出一些代價。這就是我今天想要告訴你們的，這就是我們的壞習慣給我們帶來的代價。也許你翻翻你的社交主頁，
"So what if I roll my eyes? It's just five seconds of my time. How could it be hurting me?" Well, researchers have found that envying your friends on Facebook, actually leads to depression. That's just one of the traps that our minds can set for us. Have you ever complained about your boss?
會想就算我翻了個白眼，又會怎樣？一共也不過5秒鐘，這怎麼會傷害到我呢？但研究人員發現，在社交網路上嫉妒你的朋友，其實會導致抑鬱。而這只是我們的思想可能為我們設定的陷阱之一。你曾經抱怨過你的老闆嗎？
Or looked at your friends' lives and thought, "Why do they have all the luck?” You can't help thinking that way, right? That way of thinking seems small in the moment. In fact, it might even make you feel better in the moment. But that way of thinking is eating away at your mental strength.
或者看著你朋友的生活，想著“為什麼他們會這麼幸運？”你很難不這麼想，對吧？現在看來這種想法是很細微，但事實上，這可能會讓你此刻感到更好，但這種思維方式正在侵蝕你的精神力量。
There's three kinds of destructive beliefs that make us less effective, and rob us of our mental strength. The first one is unhealthy beliefs about ourselves. We tend to feel sorry for ourselves.
有三種破壞性的信念，會降低我們的效率，並剝奪我們的精神力量。第一個是對我們自己的不健康的認知，我們傾向於為自己感到難過。
And while it's OK to be sad when something bad happens, self-pity goes beyond that. It's when you start to magnify your misfortune. When you think things like, "Why do these things always have to happen to me?
當糟糕的事情發生時，悲傷是可以的，但自憐的情緒不止這樣。當你開始放大你的不幸，當你去想，為什麼這些事總要發生在我的身上？
I shouldn't have to deal with it." That way of thinking keeps you stuck, keeps you focused on the problem, keeps you from finding a solution. And even when you can't create a solution, you can always take steps to make your life or somebody else's life better.
我不該處理這件事的，這種思維方式會讓你陷入困境，讓你找不到解決的辦法。即使你不能創造一個解決方案，你也可以努力使你的生活或其他人的生活更好。
But you can't do that when you're busy hosting your own pity party. The second type of destructive belief that holds us back is unhealthy beliefs about others. We think that other people can control us, and we give away our power.
但當你忙於憐憫自己的時候，你就不可能做得到了。阻礙我們前進的第二種破壞性認知，是對他人的不健康認知。我們認為別人可以控制我們，就因此放棄了我們的力量。
But as adults who live in a free country, there's very few things in life that you have to do. So when you say, "I have to work late," you give away your power. Yeah, maybe there will be consequences if you don't work late, but it's still a choice.
但是作為一個生活在自由國度的成年人，生活中幾乎沒有什麼事情是你必須要做的，所以當你說我必須得工作到很晚的時候，你就放棄了你的權力。是，如果你不加班到很晚，也許會有不好的後果，但這仍然是你做出的選擇。
Or when you say, "My mother-in-law drives me crazy," you give away your power. Maybe she's not the nicest person on earth, but it's up to you how you respond to her, because you're in control.
或者當你說“我岳母快把我逼瘋了”的時候，你就放棄了你的力量，也許她不是世界上最好的人。但是，也都取決於你對她的反應，因為你能控制自己。
The third type of unhealthy belief that holds us back, is unhealthy beliefs about the world. We tend to think that the world owes us something. We think, "If I put in enough hard work, then I deserve success."
第三種不健康的信念讓我們望而卻步，那就是對世界的不健康信念。我們傾向於認為世界欠我們一些東西。我們認為如果我付出了足夠的努力，那麼我就應該獲得成功。
But expecting success to fall into your lap like some sort of cosmic reward, will only lead to disappointment. But I know it's hard to give up our bad mental habits. It's hard to get rid of those unhealthy beliefs that we've carried around with us for so long.
但是期望這種成功，就像期望某種上天的賞賜落入你的懷中一樣，就只能帶來失望。但我們知道，放棄我們的壞心理習慣，是很難的，很難擺脫那些我們保留了太久的不健康觀念。
But you can't afford not to give them up. Because sooner or later, you're going to hit a time in your life where you need all the mental strength that you can muster.
但你不能不放棄它們，因為你遲早會在生命中遇到一個時刻，為了專注你需要調動所有的精神力量。
When I was 23 years old, I thought I had life all figured out. I graduated from grad school. I landed my first big job as a therapist. I got married. And I even bought a house. And I thought, "This is going to be great! I've got this incredible jump start on success." What could go wrong?
我23歲的時候，我以為我把人生都弄清楚了，我從研究生院畢業後，找到了第一份重要的心理治療師工作。然後我結婚了，我甚至買了一棟房子。我想一切都會這麼棒的，我在成功的道路上取得了令人難以置信的飛躍，還能出什麼差錯？
That all changed for me one day when I got a phone call from my sister. She said that our mother was found unresponsive and she'd been taken to the hospital. My husband Lincoln and I jumped in the car and rushed to the hospital.
但有一天一切都變了。我接到我姐姐的電話，她說我媽媽突然喪失了行動能力，被送到了醫院。我丈夫和我跳上車，衝進了醫院。
We couldn't imagine what could be wrong. My mother was only 51. She didn't have any history of any kind of health problems. When we got to the hospital, doctors explained she'd had a brain aneurysm.
我們無法想象會出什麼事，我母親只有51歲，她沒有任何病史。我們到了醫院後，醫生解釋說她得了腦動脈瘤。
And within 24 hours, my mother, who used to wake up in the morning saying, "It's a great day to be alive," passed away. That news was devastating to me. My mother and I had been very close.
在24小時內，我的母親，那個曾經會在早上醒來說今天還活著真好的人，去世了。那個訊息對我來說是毀滅性的，我媽媽和我一直很親密。
As a therapist, I knew on an intellectual level how to go through grief. But knowing it, and doing it, can be two very different things. It took a long time before I felt like I was really healing.
作為一名治療師，我在理智上知道如何度過悲傷。但是，知道和做可能是兩件非常不同的事。過了很長一段時間，我才覺得自己真的好起來。
And then on the three year anniversary of my mother's death, some friends called, and invited Lincoln and me to a basketball game. Coincidentally, it was being played at the same auditorium where I'd last seen my mother, on the night before she'd passed away.
然後在我母親去世三週年的時候，一些朋友打來電話邀請我和丈夫去看一場籃球賽。巧合的是這場比賽，就是在她去世的前一天晚上，在我最後一次見到我母親的那個禮堂裡進行的。
I hadn't been back there since. I wasn't even sure I wanted to go back. But Lincoln and I talked about it, and ultimately we said, "Maybe that would be a good way to honor her memory." So we went to the game. And we actually had a really good time with our friends.
母親去世以後我就再也沒有去過，我都不確定我還想不想回去。但林肯和我談過，最後我們說，也許這是紀念她的好辦法，所以我們就去看比賽了。我和朋友度過了非常愉快的時光。
On the drive home that night, we talked about how great it was to finally be able to go back to that place, and remember my mother with a smile, rather than all those feelings of sadness.
那天晚上開車回家的路上，我們說起來，終於能夠回到那個地方，用微笑紀念我的母親，而不是所有那些悲傷的感覺，這是多麼棒的一件事情啊。
But shortly after we got home that night, Lincoln said he didn't feel well. A few minutes later, he collapsed. I had to call for an ambulance. His family met me at the emergency room. We waited for what seemed like forever, until finally a doctor came out.
但那天晚上我們回到家後不久，林肯說他感覺不舒服，幾分鐘後他昏倒了。我不得不叫救護車，他的家人在急診室見我。我們好像等了幾個世紀，最後有一位醫生出來。
But rather than taking us out back to see Lincoln, he took us back to a private room, and sat us down, and explained to us that Lincoln, who was the most adventurous person I'd ever met, was gone. We didn't know at the time, but he'd had a heart attack. He was only 26.
但他並沒有帶我們回去見林肯，而是把我們帶回一間私人房間。讓我們坐下，並向我們解釋，我生命中的最愛冒險的林肯，他已經走了。我們當時不知道他心臟病發作了，他當時只有26歲。
He didn't have any history of heart problems. So now I found myself a 26-year-old widow, and I didn't have my mom. I thought, "How am I going to get through this?" And to describe that as a painful period in my life feels like an understatement.
他沒有心臟病史。所以現在我發現自己成了一個26歲的寡婦，母親也走了，我在想我怎麼才能熬過這一關，把這描述為我生命中的痛苦時期，感覺就像是一種輕描淡寫。
And it was during that time that I realized when you're really going through tough times, good habits aren't enough. It only takes one or two small habits to really hold you back.
正是那段時間裡，我意識到，當你真正經歷困難的時候，好的習慣是不夠的，只需要一兩個小的壞習慣，就能真的讓你退縮。
I worked as hard as I could, not just to create good habits in my life, but to get rid of those small habits, no matter how small they might seem. Throughout it all, I held out hope that someday life could get better. And eventually it did.
我努力工作，不只是為了在生活中養成好習慣，而是為了擺脫那些壞習慣，不管它們看起來有多小。從始至終，我都懷著有一天生活會變得更好的希望。最終它實現了。
A few years down the road, I met Steve. And we fell in love. And I got remarried. We sold the house that Lincoln and I had lived in, and we bought a new house, in a new area, and I got a new job.
幾年後，我遇見了史蒂夫，我們相愛了，我再婚了。我賣掉了林肯和我們曾經住過的房子，買了一棟新房子，在一個新的地區，找到了一份工作。
But almost as quickly as I breathed my sigh of relief over that fresh start that I had, we got the news that Steve's dad had terminal cancer.
當時，當我剛剛開始新的生活，本來剛剛鬆了一口氣的時候，聽到了史蒂夫父親得了癌症晚期的訊息。
And I started to think, "Why do these things always have to keep happening? Why do I have to keep losing all my loved ones? This isn't fair." But if I'd learned anything, it was that that way of thinking would hold me back.
我開始思考，為什麼這些事總是要發生呢？為什麼我要不斷地失去我所有的親人，這不公平。但如果我學到了什麼，那就是這種思維方式只會讓我退縮。
I knew I was going to need as much mental strength as I could muster, to get through one more loss. So I sat down and I wrote a list of all the things mentally strong people don't do. And I read over that list.
我知道我會需要，儘可能多的精神力量，來熬過更多的損失。所以我坐下來寫了一張清單，上面列出了精神強健的人，不會做的事情。我看了一遍。
It was a reminder of all of those bad habits that I'd done at one time or another, that would keep me stuck. And I kept reading that list over and over. And I really needed it.
列出了所有的壞習慣來提醒自己，那些曾經困擾我，可能使我再次陷入困境的習慣。我一遍又一遍地讀那份清單，我真的很需要它。
Because within a few weeks of writing it, Steve's dad passed away. My journey taught me that the secret to being mentally strong, was that you had to give up your bad mental habits.
因為在列出這份清單的幾個星期後，史蒂夫的爸爸去世了。我的經歷教會了我精神堅強的秘訣，那就是你必須放棄壞的心理習慣。
Mental strength is a lot like physical strength. If you wanted to be physically strong, you'd need to go to the gym and lift weights. But if you really wanted to see results, you'd also have to give up eating junk food. Mental strength is the same.
精神力量和體力很相似，如果你想要身體強壯，就要去健身房舉重，但如果你真的想看到成效，你就要放棄吃垃圾食品。精神力量也是一樣的。
If you want to be mentally strong, you need good habits like practicing gratitude. But you also have to give up bad habits, like resenting somebody else's success. No matter how often that happens, it will hold you back.
如果你想變得堅強，你需要養成好的習慣，比如感恩。但你也必須放棄壞習慣，比如嫉妒別人的成功。不管這種事情是否經常發生，它都會阻礙你進步。
So, how do you train your brain to think differently? How do you give up those bad mental habits that you've carried around with you? It starts by countering those unhealthy beliefs that I talked about, with healthier ones.
那麼你如何訓練你的大腦，以不同的方式思考呢？你怎樣能放棄那些，你一直有的壞心理習慣。要從對抗那些，我說過的不健康的認知開始，養成更健康的認知。
For example, unhealthy beliefs about ourselves mostly come about because we're uncomfortable with our feelings. Feeling sad, or hurt, or angry, or scared, those things are all uncomfortable. So we go to great lengths to avoid that discomfort.
例如對自己不健康的認知，主要來源於我們對自己不舒服的感覺。覺得悲傷、受傷、憤怒、害怕，這些事情都是不舒服的，所以我們盡了最大的努力來避免這種不適，
We try to escape it by doing things like hosting a pity party. And although that's a temporary distraction, it just prolongs the pain. The only way to get through uncomfortable emotions, the only way to deal with them, is you have to go through them.
我們會試著，透過不斷憐憫自己來逃避，儘管這只是暫時分散注意力，但它只會延長痛苦，克服不舒服情緒的唯一方法。也是處理它們的唯一方法，就是你必須經歷它們。
To let yourself feel sad, and then move on. To gain confidence in your ability to deal with that discomfort. Unhealthy beliefs about others come about because we compare ourselves to other people.
讓自己感到悲傷，然後繼續前行，以幫助你獲得足夠的心理能力，來獲得處理不適的能力。對別人有不健康的認知，是因為我們把自己和別人作比較。
We think that they're either above us or below us. Or we think that they can control how we feel, or that we can control how they behave. Or we blame them for holding us back. But really, it's our own choices that do that.
我們認為他們不是比我們好，就是比我們壞，或者我們認為他們可以做更好或者我們可以控制他們的行為，要不就怪他們拖我們的後腿。但說真的，一切都是我們自己的選擇。
You have to accept that you're your own person, and other people are separate from you. The only person you should compare yourself to, is the person that you were yesterday.
你必須承認你是自己一個人，其他人和你沒有關係的，你唯一應該拿自己作比較的人，就是你昨天的那個人。
And unhealthy beliefs about the world come about because deep down, we want the world to be fair. We want to think that if we put in enough good deeds, enough good things will happen to us. Or if we tough it out through enough bad times, we'll get some sort of reward.
之所以會對世界產生不健康的認知，是因為在內心深處，我們希望世界是公平的。我們做了足夠多的善事，就會想應當得到足夠多的回報。或者我們熬過了足夠多的困難時期，我們會得到某種獎勵。
But ultimately you have to accept that life isn't fair. And that can be liberating. Yeah, it means you won't necessarily be rewarded for your goodness, but it also means no matter how much you've suffered, you're not doomed to keep suffering.
但最終你必須接受生活是不公平的。這是一種解脫，是的，這意味著你不一定會因為你的善良，而得到回報，這也意味著無論你遭受了多少痛苦，都不能代表你還會繼續受苦。
The world doesn't work that way. Your world is what you make it. But of course before you can change your world, you have to believe that you can change it.
世界不是這樣運作的，你的世界是由你創造的，當然，你可以改變你的世界之前，你必須相信你可以改變它。
I once worked with this man who had been diabetic for years. His doctor referred him to therapy because he had some bad mental habits that were starting to affect his physical health. His mother had died from complications of diabetes at a young age,
我曾經和一個患糖尿病多年的人一起工作，他的醫生讓他去接受治療，因為他有一些壞的心理習慣，這些壞習慣已經開始影響他的身體健康了。他的母親在很小的時候就死於糖尿病併發症，
so he just believed he was doomed, and he'd given up trying to manage his blood sugar altogether. In fact, his blood sugar had gotten so high lately, that it was starting to affect his vision. And he had his driver's license taken away. And his world was shrinking.
所以他認為自己註定要死。於是就放棄了控制血糖的努力。事實上他的血糖最近太高了，已經開始影響他的視力了，他的駕照也被吊銷了，他的世界正在縮小。
When he came into my office, it was clear he knew all the things he could do to manage his blood sugar. He just didn't think it was worth the effort. But eventually, he agreed to make one small change.
當他來到我的辦公室時，他很清楚的知道所有能控制他血糖的方式，他只是覺得不值得讓自己付出這麼大的努力。但最終他同意做一個小小的改變。
He said, "I'll give up my two liter-a-day Pepsi habit, and I'll trade it in for Diet Pepsi." And he couldn't believe how quickly his numbers started to improve. And even though he came every week to remind me how horrible Diet Pepsi tasted, he stuck with it.
他說，我要放棄每天喝兩升百事可樂的習慣，並開始喝健怡可樂，他好轉的速度讓他自己都不敢相信，儘管他每週都會來，提醒我，百事可樂有多難喝，但他還在堅持喝下去。
And once he started to see a little bit of improvement, he said, "Well, maybe I could look at some of my other habits." He said, "I could trade in my nightly bowl of ice cream for a snack with a little less sugar."
而一旦他開始看到了一些改善。他說也許我該嘗試些其他的習慣了，他說我可以把我每晚的一碗冰淇淋，換成一份糖分少的一點零食，
And then one day he was at a thrift store with some friends, and he found this beat-up old exercise bike. He bought it for a couple of bucks, and he brought it home, and he parked it in front of his TV.
然後有一天他和一些朋友在家舊貨店裡，發現了一輛破舊的健身腳踏車，他花了幾塊錢就把它買了回去，然後把它放在電視機前。
And he started to pedal while he'd watch some of his favorite shows every night. And not only did he lose weight, but one day, he noticed he could see the TV just a little bit more clearly than he had before.
每天晚上他看自己最喜歡的節目的時候，他就開始踩著踏板，後來他不僅體重減輕了，而且有天注意到，他看的電視比以前看得更清楚了。
And suddenly it occurred to him, maybe the damage done to his eyesight wasn't permanent. So he set a new goal for himself — to get his driver's license back. And from that day forward, he was on fire.
他突然想起來，也許他的視力受到的損害不是永久性的。所以他為自己設定了一個新的目標，拿回他的駕照。從那天起他就開始發力了。
By the end of our time together, he was coming in every week saying, "OK, what are we going to do this week?" Because he finally believed that he could change his world. And that he had the mental strength to change it.
當我們在一起的時候，他每週都會來我這裡。然後跟我說，好吧，這周我們該做什麼，因為他終於相信他能改變自己的世界了，他有足夠的精神力量去改變這一切。
And that he could give up his bad mental habits. And it all started with just one small step. So I invite you to consider what bad mental habits are holding you back?
可以改掉他的壞心理習慣，一切都是從一小步開始的。所以我邀請你考慮一下，是哪些壞習慣阻礙了你的進步？
What unhealthy beliefs are keeping you from being as mentally strong as you could be? And what's one small step that you could take today? Right here, right now. Thank you.
是什麼不健康的認知，讓你不能像你所能做到的那樣的堅強，你今天能邁出怎樣的一小步？就從這裡開始，從現在開始吧。謝謝。
精神強大的人絕不會做的 13 件事情
Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become more mentally strong.
精神強壯的人有健康的習慣。他們透過各種方式管理自己的情緒，思想和行為，從而為生活的成功做好準備。看看那些精神上強壯的人沒有這樣做的事情，你也可以變得更加精神強大。
1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves
1. 不把寶貴時間花在自怨自艾上
Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.
不管這種自怨自艾是針對自己當時所處的環境, 還是受到的(不公平)待遇。精神強大的人明白不盡如人意才是人生常態, 而每個人都得為自己行為的結果負責。
2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power
2. 不把讓自己開心或者沮喪的權力交予別人
They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.
精神強大的人明白自己才應該是那個控制自己行為和情緒的人, 他們認為自己的優勢在於有能力左右自己對事情和環境做出何種反應。
3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change
3. 他們不怕改變
Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.
如果注意觀察, 你會發現精神強大的人不怕改變。他們歡迎積極的變化，並願意保持靈活性。他們理解變革是不可避免的，並相信他們的適應能力。
4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control
4.不會在自己無法控制的事情上浪費能量
You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.
如果注意觀察, 你會發現精神強大的人很少抱怨交通擁堵、行李丟失、尤其是很少抱怨「別人」。因為他們認為反正這些都是他們很難控制的, 唯一能控制的就是令人不爽的情形出現時, 自己如何應對, 怎麼調節自己的情緒和心態。
5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone
5. 不刻意討好他人
Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.
精神強大的人會告訴自己，不必在任何時候都討好他人。精神強大的人會努力做到溫和、公平、在必要的時候釋放善意, 但絕不避諱坦率直言。因為他們知道, 一旦對方被惹怒, 他們也擔得起，並且自己有能力把事情處理得體面。
6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks
6.他們不擔心計算風險
They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action.
他們不會冒魯莽或愚蠢的風險，但不介意承擔計算風險。在做出重大決策之前，精神強壯的人會花時間權衡風險和收益，並且在他們採取行動之前，他們會充分了解潛在的不利因素。
7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past
7. 不對過去不捨
Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.
能面對過去及其帶給你的回憶或者教訓, 本身就是精神強大的表現。但不要讓它們耗費你太多的意志和情緒（真的會消耗, 大家都懂的）, 不管是已經過去的痛苦還是已經過去的輝煌。
精神強大的人會把主要精力和能量用來改善現狀，以及為未來打一個好的基礎。
They accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.
8.不會一而再地犯同樣錯誤
精神強大的人接受自己必須為結果負責這一殘酷的人間規則，並且願意從失敗中吸取教訓。
已經有歷史資料表明異常成功的管理者或創業家們最強的能力之一, 就是擁有精準和高效的自省和反思能力。
9. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success
9.他們不要反對別人的成功
Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.
精神強大的人可以欣賞和慶祝其他人的人生成就。當別人超越他們時，他們不會嫉妒或感到受騙。相反，他們認識到成功來自努力工作，他們願意為自己成功的機會而努力。
10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure
10. 第一次失敗後他們不會放棄
They don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.
他們不認為失敗是放棄的理由。相反，他們將失敗視為成長和改進的機會。他們願意繼續努力，直到他們做對了。
11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time
他們不害怕單獨的時間
Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.
精神強壯的人可以容忍孤獨，他們不擔心沉默。他們並不害怕獨自思考，他們可以利用停機時間來提高工作效率。他們喜歡自己的公司，並不依賴別人來陪伴和娛樂，而是可以獨自享受。
12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything
12.他們不覺得世界欠他們任何東西
They don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.
他們覺得生活中沒有權利。他們並非天生具有其他人會照顧他們的心態，或者世界必須給他們一些東西。相反，他們根據自己的優點尋找機會。
13. They Don’t Expect Immediate Results
13.他們不期望立即結果
Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time.
無論他們是在努力改善自己的健康狀況還是開展新業務，精神上強大的人都不會期待立竿見影的效果。相反，他們盡其所能地運用自己的技能和時間，並瞭解真正的變化需要時間。
