這一根本不同，是中外誤解的主要原因之一。

一百八十五年來，中國努力尋找國際上的真朋友。每一次我們認為找到了，都是我們的一廂情願，而對方總是要經濟或戰略利益，無論是蘇聯、朝鮮、越南、阿爾巴尼亞，還是美國。

過去，中國太窮、也被認為太弱。中國只能學習世界、試圖融入外部已有世界秩序，因為沒有國家會聽一個窮國的，更不可能接受中國“ 喻於義 ”的國際關係準則。那會被其他國家認為是笑話、或窮國逐利的雕蟲小技。

一個笑話是中國在1950至1970年代那麼窮的時期，居然大量經濟援助阿爾巴尼亞。中國認為是道義上的朋友，而阿爾巴尼亞從來認為當然是利益的交換。中國最後認為不能承受而在1978年左右停止了。

今天美國極力主張自己利益至上，還不是接受“君子喻以義”的時候。但可以試試讓歐洲知道中國處理國際關係猶如歐洲任何理性的人處理個人關係，認同國際關係也應該“君子喻以義”。

建立在永恆利益為國際關係基礎上的世界，是不穩定的世界，因為貪婪的利益和萬變的結盟帶來經常的衝突。

建立在中國傳統“喻於義”價值觀為國際關係基礎的世界，才是更和平、更仁愛、更友好、更繁榮的世界。

China’s tradition from ancient times is to use the same criteria for international relationship and interpersonal relationship, which is “君子喻於義小人喻於利 friendship of gentlemen is based on honorable principles whereas that of the opposite based on financial interests”.

This is fundamentally different from the Western tradition of international relationship in which there is no permanent friendship only permanent interests.

This fundamental difference is one major source of misunderstanding between China and the rest of the world.

China was trying to find true friendship over the past 185 years. Every time we thought we had found one, it turned out to be wishful thinking on our side, while the other side was always looking for financial gains or strategic gains, the Soviet Union, Korea, Vietnam, Albania, and the US.

In the past, China was poor and viewed as weak. China could only try to learn and fit into the existing world order because no other country would listen to a poor country and even less likely to accept the Chinese idea of honor-based international relationship. It would have been considered as a joke or a trick to beg for money by a poor country.

One ridiculous example was that China provided  much financial aid to Albania when China was poor from the 1950s to the 1970s. China thought that Albania was a friend based on common causes while Albania thought that of course it was based on Chinese money. China finally decided we could not afford it and cut it off in 1978.

The difference may remain but it is time that Europe knows Chinese view of international relationship as the same as any rational European view of personal relationship.

A world based on permanent interests in international relationship is an unstable world, of shifting conflicts caused by shifting interests and alliances.

A world based on the traditional Chinese values of honor and justice in international relationship is a world, much more peaceful, kinder, gentler and prosperous.

It is impossible at the moment to get Americans to listen to the fundamental idea underlying Chinese tradition of diplomacy, when the US is obsessed with maintaining its own dominance, despite the fact shown by history again and again that no country can dominate the world forever.

The best wish is for China and Europe to look at their (and our) histories and accept that fact and decide to build a world based on honor.